sixteen

I woke up and looked across at the most wonderful person I have ever met and I know, as I have for the last 15 years and 364 days that I am happy and blessed. Tomorrow will be 16 years of wedded bliss and I wanted to say a few things for future grooms, things to think about when choosing your bride:

1 - The greatest sound in the world should be her laughter. Not only should your future wife laugh with you, but occasionally she should laugh at you. Mine points when she laughs, just to make sure I know she is laughing at me and not some other fool. When she laughs at my jokes or silliness, she is validating me. When she laughs at my foibles, she is keeping me humble. When she laughs with me, we know that we get each other on a deep level and I feel a touch of heaven.

2 - When you look in her eyes, you should feel weak. When you watch her walk you should feel something else. After 16 years, I still have the hots for her and am amazed that she would be willing to marry me, to spend her life with me and to love me. She is so beautiful, so lovely, so hot that I feel I am the luckiest guy in the world.

3 - You should not agree with her about everything. If you agree about everything, either she is not being honest with you or you do not see her as she truly is. If you are a guy and agree that it takes 4 hours to buy one pair of pants, that going to the restroom is a group activity or that Project Runway marathons are a reason to stay home...you are a woman, stop fooling yourself. Disagreements are how you know that she is not an extension of you, but a vibrant and intelligent person capable of her own thought and opinion. If you do not get this, you are a Narcissist (did I spell that right?).

4 - You should look forward to seeing her. I can't wait to see my wife, to talk with her, to see the smile that still takes my breath away. If you think about her when at work, when driving, when out with friends...this is a good thing. Do not listen to your bitter, jealous friends. They will make the sound of a whip cracking, mock you and call you names. Embrace this. What sets you apart is the love of a good woman, do not feel bad that she is more important than they.

5 - You should cherish her. You should want to make her happy as a small repayment for the happiness she has brought you. You should want to build her up. You should see her as better than you. You should treat her like a prize, like a princess, like a precious gift. You should love her and want her and need her. Because after 16 years, I still do and it makes me feel so blessed everyday.


"I wish you a good life, a good wife and my kind of happiness" The old mentor agent said that in Jerry Maguire and I repeat it for every man who is contemplating marriage. It is truly a wondrous thing.